"Quizz Kid"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Through The Years (1997); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

Cut along the dotted line, slip in and seal the flap
Postal competition crazy though you wear the dunce's cap
Win a fortnight in Ibiza, line up for the big hand out
You'll never know unless you try, what winning's all about, be a quizz kid, be a whizz kid
Six days later there's a rush telegram, drop everything and telephone this number if you can
It's a free trip down to London for a weekend of high life
They'll wine you, dine you, undermine you, better not bring the wife, be a quizz kid, be a whizz kid
It's a try out for a quizz show that millions watch each week
Following the fate and fortunes of contestants as they speak
Answerable to everyone, responsible to all
Publicity dissected brain cells splattered on the walls
Of encyclopaedic knowledge, may be barbaric but it's fun
As the clock ticks away a lifetime, hold your head up to the gun
Of a million cathode ray tubes aimed at your tiny skull
May you find sweet inspiration, may your memory not be dull
May you rise to dizzy success, may your wit be quick and strong
May you constantly amaze us, may your answers not be wrong
May your head be on your shoulders, may your tongue be in your cheek
And most of all we pray that you may come back next week, be a quizz kid, be a whizz kid



"Crazed Institution"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

Just a little touch of make-up, just a little touch of bull
Just a little 3-chord trick embedded in your platform soul
You can wear a gold Piaget on your Semaphore wrist
You can dance the old adage with a dapper new twist
And you can ring a crown of roses round your cranium, live and die upon your cross of platinum
Join the crazed institution of the stars, be the man that you think you really are
Join the crazed institution of the stars, be the man that you know you really are
Crawl inside your major triad, curl up and laugh as your agent scores another front page photograph
Is it them or is it you throwing dice inside the loo awaiting someone else to pull the chain
Well grab the old bog-handle, hold your breath and light a candle
Clear your throat and pray for rain to irrigate the corridors that echo in your brain
Filled with empty nothingness, empty hunger pains
And you can ring a crown of roses round your cranium, live and die upon your cross of platinum
Join the crazed institution of the stars, be the man that you think you really are
Join the crazed institution of the stars, be the man that you know you really are
Just a little touch of make-up, just a little touch of bull
Just a little 3-chord trick embedded in your platform soul
You can wear a gold Piaget on your Semaphore wrist
You can dance the old adage with a dapper new twist
And you can ring a crown of roses round your cranium
Live and die upon your cross of platinum
Join the crazed institution of the stars, be the man that you think you really are
Join the crazed institution of the stars, be the man that you know you really are



"Salamander"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); 20 Years of Jethro Tull: Flawed Gems and The Other Sides of Tull (1988);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002); All The Best (2012); The Best of Acoustic Jethro Tull (2007);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015); 50 For 50 (2018)

Salamander, born in the sun-kissed flame, who was it lit your candle, branded you with your name?
I see you walking by my window in your Kensington haze, Salamander, Salamander, Salamander, burn for me and I'll burn for you



"Taxi Grab"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

Shake a leg, it's the big rush, can't find a taxi, can't find a bus
Bodies jammed in the underground evacuating London town
Nowhere to put your feet as the big store shoppers and the pavements meet
Red lights, pin stripes, short step shuffle into the night
Tea time calls, the Bingo Halls, open at seven in the old front stalls, how about a Taxi Grab
There's an empty cab by the taxi stand, driver's in the caf washing his hands
Big diesel idles, the keys inside, c'mon Sally let's take a ride
Flag down, uptown, no sweat, for rush hour travel, it's the best bet yet, Taxi Grab
Shake a leg, it's the big rush, can't find a taxi, can't find a bus
Bodies jammed in the underground evacuating London town
Tea time calls, the Bingo Halls, open at seven in the old front stalls, Taxi Grab



"From A Dead Beat To An Old Greaser"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); A Little Light Music (1992); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

From a dead beat to an old greaser, here's thinking of you
You won't remember the long nights, coffee bars, black tights and white thighs
In shop windows where blonde assistants fully-fashioned a world made of dummies
(With no mummies or daddies to reject them)
When bombs were banned every Sunday and the Shadows played F.B.I.
And tired young sax-players sold their instruments of torture
Sat in the station sharing wet dreams of Charlie Parker, Jack Kerouac, Renee Magritte, to name a few
Of the heroes who were too wise for their own good, left the young brood to go on living without them
Old queers with young faces, who remember your name
Though you're a dead beat with tired feet, two ends that don't meet
To a dead beat from an old greaser, think you must have me all wrong
I didn't care, friend, I wasn't there, friend
If it's the price of pint that you need, ask me again



"Bad-Eyed N' Loveless"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

Yes 'n she's bad-eyed and she's loveless, a young man's fancy and an old man's dream
I'm self raising and I flower in her company, give me no sugar without her cream
She's a warm fart at Christmas, she's a breath of champagne on sparkling night
Yes 'n she's bad-eyed and she's loveless, turns other women to envious green
Yes 'n she's bad-eyed and she's loveless, she's a young man's vision in my old man's dream



"Big Dipper"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

The mist rolls off the beaches, the train rolls into the station
Weekend-happiness seekers, pent-up saturation
Well, we don't mean anyone any harm, we weren't on the Glasgow train
See you at the Pleasure Beach, roller-coasting heroes
Big Dipper riding, we'll give the local lads a hiding
If they keep us from the ladies, hanging out in the penny arcades
Shaking up the Tower Ballroom, throwing up in the bathroom
Landlady's in the backroom, I'm the Big Dipper, it's the weekend rage
Rich widowed landlady, give me your spare front door key
If you're 39 or over, I'll make love to you next Thursday
I may stay over for a week or two, drop a postcard to my mum
I'll see you at the waltzer, we'll go big-dipping daily
Big Dipper riding, we'll give the local lads a hiding
If they keep us from the ladies, hanging out in the penny arcades
Shaking up the Tower Ballroom, throwing up in the bathroom
Landlady's in the backroom, I'm the Big Dipper, it's the weekend rage



"Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Repeat: The Best of Jethro Tull (1977); Live: Bursting Out (1978); Original Masters (1985); Live At Hammersmith '84 (1990);
A Little Light Music (1992); The Best of Jethro Tull: The Anniversary Collection (1993); 25 Years of Jethro Tull: Remixed Classic Songs (1993); 36 Greatest Hits (1998);
The Very Best of Jethro Tull (2001); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002); Live: Bursting Out (2004); 'A' Remaster (2004);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015); Songs From The Wood: The 40th Anniversary Country Set Edition (2017);
Heavy Horses: 40th Anniversary New Shoes Edition (2018); 50 For 50 (2018); 50th Anniversary Collection (2018); Stormwatch: 40th Anniversary Force 10 Edition (2019);
The Broadsword and The Beast: The 40th Anniversary Monster Edition (2023); Live: Bursting Out: The Inflated Edition (2024); Live In Berlin 1985 (2025)
Bootlegs: Rainbow Theatre London 8 May 1978 (1978); Watchers On The Storm (1980); Nostell Priory UK 08-24-1982 (1982); Capitol Theatre 10/28/84 (1984);
One Flute Over The Cuckoo's Nest (1990); Jack In The Green: Live In Germany 1970-1993 (1993); Songs From The Tower (2023); London Fields (2023); Live In Berlin 1985 (2023);
Live From Baloise Session Basel 11-15-2008 (2025)
Tributes: A Classic Case (1985)

The old Rocker wore his hair too long, wore his trouser cuffs too tight
Unfashionable to the end, drank his ale too light
Death's head belt buckle, yesterday's dreams, the transport caf' prophet of doom
Ringing no change in his double-sewn seams in his post-war-babe gloom
Now he's too old to Rock'n'Roll, but he's too young to die
He once owned a Harley Davidson and a Triumph Bonneville
Counted his friends in burned-out spark plugs and prays that he always will
But he's the last of the blue blood greaser boys all of his mates are doing time
Married with three kids up by the ring road, sold their souls straight down the line
And some of them own little sports cars and meet at the tennis club do's
For drinks on a Sunday, work on Monday, they've thrown away their blue suede shoes
Now they're too old to Rock'n'Roll and they're too young to die
So the old Rocker gets out his bike to make a ton before he takes his leave
Up on the A1 by Scotch Corner just like it used to be
And as he flies, tears in his eyes, his wind-whipped words echo the final take
And he hits the trunk road doing around 120 with no room left to brake
And he was too old to Rock'n'Roll, but he was too young to die
No you're never too old to Rock'n'Roll, if you're too young to die



"Pied Piper"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

Now if you think Ray blew it, there was nothing to it, they patched him up as good as new
You can see him every day riding down the queen's highway, handing out his small cigars to the kids from school
And all the little girls with their bleached blond curls clump up on their platform soles
And they say 'Hey Ray, let's ride away downtown where we can roll some alley bowls'
And Ray grins from ear to here, and whispers
So follow me, trail along, my leather jacket's buttoned up and my four-stroke song will pick you up when your last class ends
And you can tell all your friends the Pied Piper pulled you, the mad biker fooled you
I'll do what you want to if you ride with me on a Friday anything goes
So follow me, hold on tight, my school girl fancy's flowing in free flight
I've a tenner in my skin tight jeans, you can touch it if your hands are clean
The Pied Piper pulled you, the mad biker folled you
I'll do what you want to if you ride with me on a Friday anything goes
So follow me, trail along, my leather jacket's buttoned up and my four-stroke song will pick you up when your last class ends
And you can tell all your friends the Pied Piper pulled you, the mad biker fooled you
I'll do what you want to if you ride with me on a Friday anything goes
The Pied Piper pulled you, the mad biker folled you
I'll do what you want to if you ride with me on a Friday anything goes



"The Chequered Flag (Dead or Alive)"
music and lyrics by Ian Anderson

Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die (1976); Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die Remastered (2002);
Too Old To Rock N' Roll: Too Young To Die TV Special Edition (2015)

The disc brakes drag, the chequered flag sweeps across the oil-slick track
The young man's home, dry as a bone, his helmet off, he waves, the crowd waves back
One lap victory roll, gladiator soul, the taker of the day in winning has to say
Isn't it grand to be playing to the stand dead or alive
The sunlight streaks through the curtain cracks, touches the old man where he sleeps
The nurse brings up a cup of tea, two biscuits and the morning paper mystery
The hard road's end, the white god's-send is nearer everyday, in dying the old man says
Isn't it grand to be playing to the stand dead or alive
The still-born child can't feel the rain as the chequered flag falls once again
The deaf composer completes his final score, he'll never hear the sweet encore
The chequered flag, the bull's red rag, the lemming-hearted hordes, running ever faster to the shore singing
Isn't it grand to be playing to the stand dead or alive